Catching Up

The internet cries out into the night, “J!!!  Where are you??”  In the darkness nothing is heard but the faint sound of a cricket…

Well, here’s a recap since my last real post on May 6th…

May 7 – Hid under my desk from swine flu, because of a theory that it was the beginning of the zombie apocalypse.  Quickly discovered that stockpiling weapons and food in NYC is difficult.

May 9 – Ran away from New York to let the zombies have it.  Went to Texas for a week where I won the Best Son Ever award by surprising my mom for Mother’s Day.

May 11 – Went fishing with my brother and a friend who came in from the Dallas area.  Caught something that could be classified as a fish, but only because it had gills and fins.  Of all the bass in that pond, I caught the one that probably gets picked last for fishy dodgeball.

May 16 – Returned to NYC to survey the damage.  No zombies.  Yet…

May 22 – Saw the new Star Trek movie.  Mistook a fanboy for a zombie.

May 23 – Saw Terminator Salvation and Angels and Demons.  Underwhelmed.

May 25 – Memorial Day.  Met friends for a picnic in Prospect Park.  Experienced direct sunlight on my legs for the first time in 2009.  Apologized to many people.

May 28 – Met visiting Aunt and cousin for breakfast before work. 

May 30 – Took Aunt, cousin and their relatives on a walking tour of Grand Central and Rockefeller Center.  Birthday party in Harlem that evening. 

June 4 – Posted 2 ridiculous blog entries, just to get past a month of writer’s block.  Began drafting actual content for later posts.

– J


11 Responses to “Catching Up”

  1. Jean Says:

    Can we insert a some info about the fact that you showed me how to mass produce cooked chicken breasts, and that we, or rather you with my dubious assistance, didn’t poison anyone? I’ll tell that story for years to come.

  2. Texas Grandma Says:

    Oh please tell the chicken story. And yes you get an award for Mother’s Day.

  3. Popgun Says:

    Oh, hi – you’re back. That’s good – your sense of humor should be published regularly.


  4. Ali Says:

    I find the June 4th entry most promising, indeed. 🙂

    Any further zombie reports? Please alert soonest, as Zombie Apocalypse Readiness Plans will need to be implemented.

    Finally, YES! TELL THE CHICKEN STORY! J & Jean, one stove, one grill, and an Ali enjoying the show? This is something that the internet needs almost as much as you need a spatula.

  5. SFord Says:

    Good to see you back blogging again. I’ve been checking regularly to find out the latest and greatest from the Rambling J.

    It might not have been a monster-sized fish, but at least you caught something that day. That is more than the rest of the company with you can say. It was definitely a good time for me, though. I hope you enjoyed it too. I wish we could do it more often.

  6. J Says:

    Jean – I’ll see how creatively I can retell that experience. Perhaps we can collaborate…

    TxGma – Hey, I have to do what I can to compete with grandkids.

    Ali – I found what I strongly believed to be a massive crowd of zombies in Union Square this afternoon during lunch. Turns out it was just a crowd of kids watching Dora the Explorer, women watching Oprah and Obama supporters.

    SFord – I had a great time too. As is often said, “A bad day of fishing is still better than a good day at work.” That’s true, unless of course you fish for a living…

  7. Ali Says:

    Y’know, I think I’d prefer the zombies. . .

  8. TexanNewYorker Says:

    I’m intrigued by the mention of this chicken story. Also,

    __ The internet cries out into the night, “J!!! Where are you??” In the darkness nothing is heard but the faint sound of a cricket… __

    What the internet doesn’t know is that it’s you, hiding, making cricket noises to throw them off your trail . . . oh, I’m sorry, did I give too much away? 😉

  9. Ali Says:

    Aaaaannnnddd. . .

    Kyleen for the win!

  10. Jean Says:

    WTF are you two talking about?

    I feel bad now – it’s not *that* good a chicken story. The gist is that once, heavily supervised by J, I managed to cook chicken for seven members of the populace, and thanks to J’s helpful input, not a single person contracted salmonella. This, in my life, is an accomplishment.

    Ironically, the lemon/garlic/rosemary sauce wasn’t an accomplishment – just the cooking of the chicken.

    All in all, a highly satisfactory night, complete with delicious chocolate almond oreo cake that looked more like gravel than food, but hey, among friends no one seems to judge too harshly. At any rate, they ate it all.

  11. Jon Says:

    The zombies were thwarted by the acidic water here in the rivers.

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